Saturday saw the first of the eagerly anticipated CBeebies Vs The Elks grudge match, with the fresh faced CBeebies sneaking a late winner for the game to finish 2-1. Pre-match festivities were high as the beer and sausage rolls were used as an incentive to lure the Elks off the car park on to the pitch. While Taff kindly supplied soft drinks and sweets for children and Cebeebies alike. Due to lack of officials Cruickshank of the Elk clan stepped forward to ref the game and a lack of flags proved to be of no concern as the Elks produced their mating horns.
The first half saw the CBeebies have the majority of the possession however they failed to turn this into goals. JJ, Charlie, Carter and Phil all had chances but were denied by stand-in Elk keeper Chum who made a series of solid saves. The Elks also managed to produce chances of their own, with Garthy putting one shot just over the bar following a poorly defended corner. Experience showed on the pitch in the first half with the CBeebies being found offside in a record breaking 20 times in a 45 minute period, the Elk defence capitalising on the enthusiasm of the Cebeebies runs. In the middle of the pitch the battle of Shanks vs Neary raged on with screams, roars, heavy panting and giggling bellowing around Gainsborough! Cruicky brought the half to a close with score at 0-0.
The second half started in the same manner as the first, with the CBeebies starting on the front foot but failing to convert chances due to some solid defending and goalkeeping from the Elks. The veteran side began to get the ball on the ground more frequently and had good spells of possession and begain to create chances, forcing the CBeebies defence into some good tackles. Garthy again came close for the Elks from another corner, with his header just skimming over the bar. The younsters responded well following this attempt and earned themselves a corner of their own. Phil put in a great corner which was 'shouldered' in by Rhino, scoring his first goal of the season and putting the CBeebies in front.
Following the goal the match became more closely matched with both teams carving out chances. The second goal of the game arrived and went the way of the Elks. Following a defensive mix up by the CBeebies Garthy played JJ through who finished well to bring the game level at 1-1. The CBeebies were clearly frustrated by the goal and started playing more direct in an attempt to snatch a winner, this also allowed the Elks opportunities to seek a winner of their own on the break. Late in the half the winner was scored by Carter to send the CBeebies on their way to an important win. Phil had broken through through the Elks and had lifted the ball over Chum only for Jock to 'accidently' trip Phil in the box......but Carter was on hand to knock the free ball into an empty net. The Elks pushed on in the final five to find another equaliser but it was not to be and the youngsters took first blood in what is sure to be the war of the apocolapse as CBeebies battle the Elks!
Sir Graham Plummington-Plum
Lord Of Gainsborough Manor
We also received this letter to our very own Points Of View programme hosted daily by Des Lynam on the BBTV digital channel...
Dear Points Of View,
We are writing in regards to the association football match on Saturday in which the regular Black Boy FC team locked horns with the newly formed diet version of the Black Boy – The Elks. As the founding members of the newly formed side, it was nice to receive the warm welcome that we did as we arrived in the gravel based, pot holed landing zone you youngsters call the car park. To be greeted by that charming disabled man was a lovely touch and added to that the honour of being able to meet one of the players, already kitted up and sporting a cake based nickname - was a dream come true for some of our pensioners.
The hospitality didn’t stop there with several youngsters performing a ritual known as ‘belly’ patting on some of our players was also much appreciated.
As for the game we were really looking forward to the challenge of playing against some of the best players in the Bury & District league division two and although they didn’t turn up in the end, found the opposition provided was ample for our needs. We do however strongly oppose the treatment of that poor little disabled man, who having finished his job as welcome committee was made to hide under a fishing umbrella whilst the game was on. Restricted view seats are one thing, but the disability ticketing scheme at your club needs to be addressed. At one point the poor little retard was so close to the action that he was struck on the leg by the ball which could have seriously harmed him. As it was he showed a nice touch and to be honest I think that the benefit fraud agency may well want to re-open his case - although to be fair to them he does have one of those mong-like faces so could be on the level.
As for the game itself, the Elks found the experiencing enlightening and have since agreed to continue the journey by entering a league, although we won’t be doing it in hand-me-downs. It should also be mentioned that who ever used to play number ‘4’ for the Black Boy juniors suffers from terrible bad body odour, whilst I’m assuming that the number 3 shirt was owned by that of a small Irish child?. Thanks should also be passed on to the flying banana who stood in the goal for 90 minutes, only moving once to get out of the way of the ball to level the game. Well done to Sylvester Stallone for scoring the touch down there – foam fingers were waving like nobody’s business all over Manhatten as that went in.
It was also nice to see some of the Black Boy juniors extending their hospitality into the evening, although we did all appreciate that most had to go home early as it was ‘bath night’. The young Leighton brothers made up for the departure of the younger members by staying out until well after bed time – I can only assume that these two are gypsies and don’t live by the usual rules? - particularly as the older one seemed to have a bad addiction to Faust deine Freundin.
Anyway, we just wanted to officially thank all of the members of the Black Boy CBeebies for a lovely day out. Next year, you can come to our place.
Kind Regards
Miss Dave Neary and Juan Sok Revens
Well Saturday's game was full of effort and commitment against Tollgate but in the end it wasn't enough to snatch a point and the game ended with The Mighty Boy on the wrong end of a 1-0 scoreline.
It was hardly a game for the neutrals with a congested 90 minutes not helped by a slippery bobbly pitch which saw players on both sides struggling for grip and time on the ball. Chances in the first half were at a premium and we struggled to get the ball down and dictate our passing game as well as I think we would have liked. Tollgate looked dangerous with pace down the wings but I think our defending was good enough to limit them to half chances and shots from distance. When they did win corners, Driver's good handling and some committed headers meant that we dealt with their aerial threat quite well.
By contrast, we struggled to get our wingers in the game and also found it tough to support our front players without leaving gaps in midfield. Indeed, both sides looked most likely to score when breaking from the other side's forays forward. Leighton broke forward well from a Tollgate corner with a burst through the middle but could only find Phil in an offside position when he may have been better going himself.
Half time saw some forced substitutions and an inspirational and passionate team-talk from assistant manager Neil Ring. Black Boy started the second half brightly by finding Bates and Taff down the wings more regularly while at the back, Wager and Delo continued to look composed and matched the physical presence of the big Tollgate attackers. The midfield was again a battlefield but we certainly had periods where we edged it and managed to find a bit of space.
As the game wore on, it looked increasingly like one goal would settle it and that was exactly how it turned out. Some confusion by the Tollgate keeper led to a Black Boy corner after good pressing by Austin and we pushed men forward in search of an equaliser which ultimately became our undoing. When the ball was swung in and cleared, Tollgate broke with a long punt forward which was squared for a tap-in into the empty net from a yard with just a few minutes to play.
The result was maybe a bit harsh on us as we matched the home side for much of the match only to be denied a point at the death in a game where neither keeper was seriously worked and had nil-nil written all over it until the final moments.
For now though we really have to dust ourselves off and look to the next league match against Sporting '87 for a response in another mid-table clash (the kind of game we really should be looking to win). At the moment, it is very congested in the middle of the league so a win would see us leapfrog Sporting and we could end up anywhere between 3rd and 8th after the match - let's hope it's the former.
On one final note, there is a Black Boy social evening after the game on Saturday, regardless of whether we are playing Sporting or the Vet's, with live music and a potentially coma-inducing amount of beer. Everyone is welcome and it would be good to see as many people as possible there, even if you can only stay for a couple.
Peace Out.
After a tightly contested 90 minutes BBFC take a big three points against Wickhambrook to move into the top 5 places in the league. In a game which at times looked to be heading for a bore draw it was last years players player of the year Mark Bates who turned in from close range to give us the important win.
Well all in all it was far from a pretty game of football and we have definitely performed better this year but it was great to see us dig in and battle for a full 90 minutes to take a win. A good performance again from the defence limited most clear shooting chances for Wickhambrook, Rees and Wager doing a great job of getting stuck in keeping them out of the box. Driver's resurgence continued due to his new found faith in his magic gloves, with the keeper collecting loose balls and punching crosses away effectively. After last week it was good to see our defending of set pieces was improved, though Wickhambrook still looked most threatening from these positions due to their good delivery.
In the middle of the park all players had to really show 100% effort to keep up with a very fit midfield for Wickhambrook. In the first half we had to pull Phil back into midfield to match their three man midfield and it made a huge difference to the performance with Wickhambrook having far less time on the ball and not being able to break down the middle of the pitch. Shanks, Garthy and Phil did a great job second half at keeping their midfield quiet and that allowed for us to have greater possession and get more chances on goal. JJ and Sean came on second half and added to suring up the center of the pitch and battled hard in the last moments to keep Wickhambrook out of our box.
Our wide players had another great performance collectively with both flanks breaking through and providing some great balls into the box, as well as getting the majority of our goal scoring chances. Charlie and Ringo had another strong performance on the left getting forward whenever possible but also doing a good job at tracking back and stopping crosses coming in from the left. Both had chances to score as well with Charlie fancying himself for a Van Persie volley which was not far over, whilst Ringo had two chances in the second half which did not quite go to plan as excitement got the better of Ringo!
Bates and Carter had a very strong game on the right as well, taking it upon themselves to swap positions saw both players get into the game more and helped raise our first half performance. Carter came very close with a first half free kick and used his pace at the back to great affect by very little finding its way down the left for Wickhambrook. Bates had a great game both at the back and when getting forward and took his chance for the goal calmly when the ball dropped to him. Unfortunately this does mean Bates has reached his yearly lofty goal heights of one per season and therefore is banned from getting forward anymore!
Up top Flan, Austin and Phil all had periods of holding the line by themselves and all showed great commitment to chasing loose balls and putting pressure on their defence. It was this work rate in the second half especially which saw their defence start to falter and allowed us to keep long periods of play in their half. Whilst chances were few and far between for the forwards it was good to see the determination from all to work for the team.
Another week where attitude on the pitch was greatly improved and every single player worked hard throughout to battle out a difficult but well deserved victory. Next week I will not be about (what a shame I hear you say) but after the last two performancs we should be high on confidence and make sure we go at Tollgate from the off and try and make a mends for throwing away a 1-0 advantage when we played them at Gainsborough. Well done all for this week and good luck for the next!
Sir Graham Plummer
Lord of Gainsborough Manor
